User talk:Rellikspartan/Spartan 120

This is a Mary-Sue. He can't be some mega-awesome, perfect, uber-famous, superhero war veteran. He needs weaknesses. You said he has bipolar disorder, but with that he wouldn't have been conscripted as a SPARTAN with something like BPD. Unless you are talking about stress-induced bipolar disorder, but even then he may be let go from the Navy. PTSD works better. You're also missing some important information. What's his rank? What squad does he belong to? He seems to overshadow John-117, the best of the SPARTANs. You need to acknowledge the fact that he's not the best, and probably not second or third best either. He can not lead humanity either, since he's a SPARTAN. SPARTANs are trained to follow not lead. They aren't at all good at interacting at interacting with civilians, let alone governing them. That should be taken out. This should be run through a spell checker, or I could spell check it for you. You should also use the SPARTAN infobox, as well as the Writer or Property template. Personally, the relationships parts seems out of place to me. You may also want to consider adding the Mature Content template because of the parts about his sexuality. A.O.A., Delta-3 Division, ONI Section-III 21:00, July 31, 2010 (UTC)