Blood and Guilt

After brutally killing 13 men on Christmas Eve, Nikolai, an eighteen year-old from the outer colonies searches for someone to unload his thoughts on, which are driving him crazy. Nikolai plans on going to the only man he trusts with his feelings to discuss the massacre and seek counsel.

The December wind chill cut through his body like those daggers he held in each hand as he staggered down the street. The sound of those metal boots echoed down the alleys of that silent city. He was covered from head to toe in the smell of fresh blood and was clutching those guilt-stained daggers for dear life. He looked down at those tools of treachery and deception that brought death to both flesh and conscience alike.

Nikolai laments, “These blades… They tricked me. That wretched steel bended my heart to its will and gave me a thirst for blood I can’t quench.”

He looked up and stopped suddenly by an old mansion. The blood soaked teenager staggered to the door and knocked thrice. Eventually a man came to the door in a robe.

Nikolai trembled and didn’t quite meet the man’s eyes as he said “I’ve nowhere else to go.”

A look of shock and disappointment covered the robed man’s face.

“Come inside. Its freezing out here.”

Nikolai shuddered and walked up the stairs and into the warm house. He saw the familiar photo of Sargent Avery Johnson and his father, both in their youth in the lobby. If a guest could squint hard enough they could see “Orion” tattooed on their arms.

The Host got both of them coffee and they sat down across from each other in the dining room. Nikolai had stopped trembling but he still couldn’t meet his host’s eyes.

The Host opened with “Is that your blood?”

Nikolai flatly said, “No.”

The host relaxed before he said, “So how many?”

Nikolai said, “Thirteen…  Maybe more. I wasn’t counting. I’m sorry Alex.”

Alex sighs heavily before saying, “You can call me Dad. What happened?”

Nikolai still doesn’t meet his father’s eyes as he explains, “They, the Diablos, sent me out after dark to kill Uncle Malcom at what was supposed to be a meeting. I didn’t manage to kill Uncle but I killed his men. I killed them all.”

Nikolai’s eyes water and he wipes them with his bloody dagger clutching hands.

“I’m so sorry. I’ve let you down. I betrayed everything our family stands for.”

Alex got up and walked over to his son.

“We will talk about your punishment in the morning. Let’s get you cleaned up.”  Alex reached for Nikolai’s daggers but his son tucked them into his stomach.

Nikolai protested, “No.”

Alex demands, “Don’t be absurd. Give me the blades.”

Nikolai, fighting back the tears, says, “I didn’t come here to get cleaned up. I came here to get something off my chest.”

Alex counters, “Yes and you did. But you look like—“

Nikolai looked directly into his father’s deep, dark eyes and said “I liked it Dad. I liked every second of it…   And I’m ashamed that I like it.”

Nikolai covered his face and broke down in tears.